How rude is that? It's up to you.

To:    Julie Klausner, Lady Business (Salon)

From:  HRIT

Re:     Recent advice to the guy with the cleavage-baring coworker

Julie, let me first state that we enjoy your column.  And, since HRIT was co-founded by a woman (i.e., me), we appreciate your effort to bring a female business perspective to Salon's readers.  But, we found your advice to the guy distracted by his coworker's visible cleavage a bit difficult to support (not to mention sexist, and, frankly, rude!).

Since we're speaking woman to woman, can we be honest?  Because I think we both know that when a woman wears a very low-cut blouse, she's doing it to show off her "assets."  Meaning that she wants to be a distraction to the males of our species.  Meaning she's expecting men to stare -- and will probably be more bothered if they don't.

Should the man use his colleague's distracting rack as an excuse to slack?  Probably not.  After all, he could potentially turn his desk around or relocate in his office if his current set-up provides a constant birds-eye view of his neighbor's cleavage.  Or, he could even review his company's dress code, and, if she's violating it, report it (even anonymously) to HR for handling.

You could have given this man this kind of advice.  But, better still, you could have used your public platform to give women some useful advice. (Isn't that your column's raison d'etre, after all?)  And, in our opinion, that advice should have been to dress for the occasion. If you're out clubbing, looking for a new man -- or just showing off for the one you've got -- feel free to showcase the goods with that low-cut top. But, if you're at work in business, looking to be appreciated for your brains, you should probably dress that way.  Your attire doesn't have to be sexless, but it shouldn't say "sex worker," either, if you want to be taken seriously as a business person.

As for your harsh parting shot about this guy's "problem" being so unimportant that you don't even have time to call him your favorite nasty insult -- isn't your entire column (and our site, and all other such commentary online) really less important than things like the plight of birds dying in the Gulf oil slick?  And, how can you slam the LW for the triviality of his question, when you considered it important enough to answer and publish in your column?

For your consideration,

Laurie | HRIT

[Read Julie's column on Salon by clicking here.]

Imagine how excited I was when my girlfriend told me she was going to name her daughter "Helena" -- the same name as me. My excitement didn't last too long, though.  Before I could even respond to the news, my friend quickly blurted out, "Oh, I didn't name her after you."

Of course I never expected my friend would have named her daughter after me!  But she seemed almost embarrassed by the connection.  Would it have killed her to simply say something like, "Even though we didn't name her after you specifically, we're such good friends we're delighted to have our daughter share your name?" 

I mean, How Rude Is That?

So my wife enlisted in the Navy and went through boot camp, which is grueling by anyone's standards.  After her graduation, we went to the mall on her liberty weekend, and she decided to treat herself to a pedicure and manicure. While the pedicurist worked on her feet, a civilian sat down next to her and, noting her military attire, asked my wife if she was in the Army. My wife kindly responded, "No, I'm in the Navy. I just completed basic training."

Of course, anyone could understand a civilian's ignorance, but this lady was not going to let ignorance slow her down one bit! She began to argue with my wife: "No, you must be in the Army." My wife just grinned and bore it while assuring her that she was, in fact, in the Navy. But this lady wouldn't let it go. My wife gave up and just stopped talking and eventually left to get her manicure done.

I sat on the other side of the salon out of earshot, but I got this detailed account moments later when we left.  Our group of graduates and myself got a good laugh over the civilian lady who was certain that my Navy wife was, in fact, in the Army. Until then we didn't know the Army sent espionage agents into other branches of the military. My wife continues her undercover ways to this day. She even has me fooled.

Really, lady, How Rude Is That?

San Francisco: a city legendary for social justice and kindness.  Except, of course, behind the wheel.  Then it's the wild, wild west for some.

Thankfully, Stanley Roberts of local station KRON is always out on the streets with his camera crew, catching People in the act of Behaving Badly.

Today's road rudeness: people jumping a long queue of cars waiting to cross the always-clogged Bay Bridge.  SF cops caught them abusing the bus lane, and People Behaving Badly caught it on video.  If you've ever been annoyed by a driver who thinks it's perfectly okay to zoom down the breakdown or carpool lane and cut in front of the long line of traffic in which you've been dutifully waiting, this one's for you: