How rude is that? It's up to you.
by Susan on January 25, 2011
My husband and I are lucky to live in a desirable beach town in Southern California along with our three young daughters. Our eldest is six and started school this year.While we're of course delighted to see our daughter progressing, as a teacher myself, I've had to bite my tongue each time I visit Laurel's kindergarten classroom. Laurel's teacher, a beautiful young woman, is the furthest thing from the stereotypical kind, nurturing kindergarten teacher. Instead, she is a strict disciplinarian who has created what is surely the world's largest collection of "reward systems" to maintain order. (Seriously, I'm wondering if the kids are learning that it's not worth getting out of bed unless you get a gold star, check mark, happy face or some other silly symbol of affirmation!)
My daughter, alas, has totally embraced "the system" to such an extent that she doesn't just seek out rewards -- she is visibly shaken when she contemplates "failure" of the most minute sort. I guess I can't blame her for fearing disapproval, though: since she told me that an African-American girl in her class was talking during class while the teacher was teaching about Martin Luther King Jr. Her reprimand from the teacher, "Be quiet! If it weren't for Martin Luther King you wouldn't be allowed in this class!
How Rude is That?
by HRIT staff on December 05, 2010
There seems to be a pattern among celebrity rudesters: make the big time, then start making enemies.
The latest to hit his ill-mannered stride: Josh Duhamel, of Transformers and Fergie-hubby fame, who had to be forcibly removed from flight at La Guardia airport on December 3.
Apparently unconcerned for the time and priorities of a plane-full of other passengers, Duhamel kept texting even after the plane began its taxi to the runway. After Duhamel scoffed at a flight attendant's third request for him to comply with the shut-down-your-cell regulation, the pilot turned the plane around so that Duhamel could be removed from the flight.
Ironically, Duhamel was texting to alert colleagues that his flight had been delayed. It might even have been well-mannered (the very opposite of rude!), if Duhamel had only done it while he was cooling his heels in the lounge watching the Cavaliers-Heat game in the bar before the flight.
Click to get the full story on People.com.
by Allison on December 05, 2010
Ah, the holidays. That special time of year when you reunite with family -- and remember why you see them so infrequently throughout the year.
Our family has its share of jaw dropping rudeness every year. Take last Thanksgiving, for example, when my auntie Jenny emotionally revealed that she'd been diagnosed with breast cancer. My nitwit brother Mike immediately piped up with "do you think we should work on your obituary, since we're all together?" (Auntie is thankfully fine thanks to aggressive treatment, and has generously forgiven my brother's oafishness.)
This year, my sister Sandy got the benefit of Mike's unfiltered commentary. After a long econo-class journey from grad school, Sandy arrived last to our big family dinner -- 28 people, some we hadn't seen in a couple of years! Luckily, most of the guests were near the entryway when Sandy arrived, took off her coat, and was treated to Mike blurting out, "wow, have you gained weight?"
Blushing ten shades of red, Sandy tried her best to ignore Super-Dolt's question (as did the rest of us), and headed into the kitchen for a much-needed glass of wine. Unfortunately, Mike was already there, sharing his observations with the few relatives who hadn't been present for Sandy's entrance. He even added, "do you think she could be pregnant?" -- nearly causing a heart attack for my ultra-Catholic grandparents. (My sister's not married ... nor is she pregnant.)
How Rude Is That?
by HRIT Staff on November 25, 2010
We looked forward to your Thanksgiving advice with special anticipation this week, but wound up wondering if you'd just chomped a too-tart cranberry before delivering that smackdown to the middle-aged, single LW with the estranged family. (To recap, said LW wondered aloud if invitations from long-lost friends to join them for turkey suggested they thought of her as a charity case, since she never heard from these people at any other time during the year.)
Prudie, Prudie, Prudie: maybe the LW should have just acknowledged that the invitations were well-meaning, and left it at that. And maybe it would have been okay to tell her that. But, "your letter may hold a clue as to why your estranged from your family?" OUCHAROONIE. Rude, with a side-dish of fifth-grade snottiness to boot!
It should go without saying that the LW could have had very good reasons for separating from her family -- including abuse. Moreover, the LW had already acknowledged she might be over-reacting -- after all, that's why she wrote to you for feedback. Did she really deserve such a poke in the eye? During the season of giving and sharing, no less?
Speaking of which: we all know that this time of year inspires us to get in touch with our charitable sides -- hence the once-a-year visits to the soup kitchens, holiday food drives, and, yes, scanning of the rolodex for poor, lost, single souls who might be shivering alone in Dickensian frosty garrets if it weren't for our thoughtful generosity. We do it to feel charitable ... which, of course, is an admirable impulse, but LW is not wrong for noticing the obvious.
In the spirit of Thanksgiving, we want you to know that your usually sage-and-snappy advice is one of the things we are most thankful for throughout the year -- especially since you so often help people navigate the emotional aftermath of unexpected rudeness that is our stock-in-trade here at HRIT. You are a pro, and your work almost always sets a standard we aspire to.
But, Prudie, you really were too tough on this LW, and we hope you will find a way to apologize.
Your fans at HRIT
by HRIT Staff on November 23, 2010
Fan of Google Street View? Feeling extra-super-fanatical about the service that lets you keep tabs on all the paint jobs your childhood home receives over the years?
Even if you really love the service, you might stop short of the behavior of some German mega-fans. Apparently infuriated that some homeowners took advantage of Google's offer to opt out of the service, these "defenders" of Google's mission to photograph every home on the planet took matters into their own hands, egging the abodes that now show as blurry blobs on street view.
"Google's cool," reads the notes vandals left after pelting the houses. Google IS cool. Vandalizing people's homes, on the other hand, is definitely NOT COOL.
"We by no means consider this to be acceptable behavior," said a Google spokesperson. We couldn't agree more!
Read more about this story on MSNBC.com.
About "How Rude Is That?"
"You won't believe what my sister just said to me!"
"He said WHAT?"
"I didn't know what to say. I just had to call you!"
How many times has the shock of someone else's rudeness -- intentional or accidental -- prompted you to run to tell your most trusted friend (and another friend ... and so on)?
That universal need to share our stories of being stunned, stung, bemused or amused is ...
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Rudeness Quote of the Moment
"(Politeness is) a tacit agreement that people's miserable defects, whether moral or intellectual, shall on either side be ignored and not be made the subject of reproach."